My husband only made love to me either once or twice, now he just have straight sex. Its like a wham, bam, thank you ma'am and he really thanks me. LOL. He is not and/or I just need to teach him how to be more romantic. I suppose some men just dont know how. Sad thing is, I married one of them. So, if you know how to make love and not just have sex, how do you know how to get a guy to be more romantic?
hun making love wont be fast..it will slow..with kisses touching and more...
Sit with him and tell him do you remember that time that you made love to me?? THAT was the MOST intense sex I have ever had in my liife and I really wish we would do that more...
I agree wih you that he probably just doesn't know how to be any different,but if you tell him how you feel,he may start to get it.Start with little things like a candlelit dinner of his choice,& little hugs & kisses just to show him how it feels to be touched & treated gently.It may be a slow process,but if your both willing,it will be well worth it.I've recently re-married, & my husband is the most loving gentle man I've ever met,but I lived 20yrs.with someone that didn't have it,& I didn't know how to change things,at the time.
Sex is an act with no other intention than physical pleasure -orgasm.
Making love is an emotion acted out through two bodies whom are trying to become one it's something that does not happen everytime but soo very special when it does
You can not make him make love to you nor be more romantic set down with him and let him know in very clear words what you feel is missing and maybe some examples of how to make it better ask him if there is anything he feels is lacking and go from there wait for a certain amount of time you feel is fair like maybe six months and if he has not made efforts to be want you need to be content then the love wasn't there to begin with and that would be my clue to walk away and find someone who will comunicate and compromise and listen and at least try and be what you are expressing and of course if he has needs he is missing you need to do your best to try and be what he needs give and take ya know honey I hope all works out for you!! Don't settle for anything less than you feel you deserve for anyone
The thing is...I dont think for men there is a difference. I think sex is just sex for them and love is another issue entirely. Making love is a concept in women's minds. Men can have sex with a woman they love but I am not so certain that its the same experience for them that we feel when we are having sex...making love...with a man we are in love with. Women i believe can seperate love and sex too, but we are far less apt to do so on a consistent basis. If we have consistent sex with one person then chances are we love them.
Whether my perceptions are correct or not.......I think it comes down to consideration. If you love someone then it should be important to you whether or not they are sexually satisfied. And you should make an effort to keep them that way. Witholding something so elemental as sexual satisfaction from your partner is the height of selfish behavior. And if you in turn keep quiet with it and allow him to continue to be selfish then you will also have to learn to be a VERY unhappy girl. Nobody can go without a toe curl now and again. Cripes.
I would have a very frank discussion with him about it. I would tell him that sex with him is less than satisfactory as you're sure he is aware. Also say that knowing how much he loves you it does occur to you that maybe he is just going through a stressful time, but that you will be expecting him to open up to you and work on this issue before it becomes a serious marital problem. You can't let this go. Mediocre sex is a breeding ground for resentment. Good luck talking to him. )
To me making love is when 2 people are so emotionally connected and in love with eachother they want to become one. They want to be intimately close to eachother. Sex is just 2 people wanting to get off. Sometimes in marriage it is making love and sometimes it is sex. You cannot expect it to be making love everytime. Sometimes it is just about hormones and wanting to jump your partner's bones which is a lot of fun. If you have an issue then talk to him but don't be really pushy about this otherwise he will see you as being too bossy and may not want to have relations with you. I am curious as to how long you have been married because if it has only been a few months then making love twice and having the rest being sex is pretty normal.
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